HELP! HELP! HELP! HELP! HELP! HELP?

my small speckled cat max talks to me and insults me. The worst part is that he has a British diction! its horrifying even tho im used to it. I cant stand him because he follows me around.The worst part is that he portals ( thru secret passageways or portals to get to one place to another)I cant even lock him within a room! its nervewrecking!! Please give me some advice on what to do!i need it!:(((((
Why is my cat yell so much?
Stop smoking wherever you are smoking.
My cat have a bite on her...
Have you sought back from a psychic animal communicator to see why you have the Simon of cats? He obviously loves you if he cannot be far from you. He is probably a short time ago worried about why you can actually hear him talking when so oodles of us cannot understand a word of cat language. I would also communicate with my psychiatrist or house doctor because you could be misinterpreting what he is saying to you because of some medication you are taking right now.

Good Luck!!
Why does my kitten suck on things...
Answers:    wut ever ur on [ pill,smooking]
YOU TOOK TOO MUCH
What humane of drug are you on? Your talking crazy! See a psychologist or some kind of shrink! Was that just one of your wacky dreams that you claim to be authenticity because you want to make me laugh?
How much is it to lug a...
not worth the carpal tunnel.
You need one hell of a lot more than direction. Do your homework and quit playing with the computer. "Disqualification Notice" for Kittyweezy, yeah, I know.
What can I afford my cat to...
well dont wound the poor fella
shut.the.hell.up.
How long does it appropriate for kittens...
Try and talk contained by a soothing and quite calm voice with the cat. I am certain that this will work in getting him to come around. The cat is doing this, I am sure because he is not getting the attention that he wants to. Give him some attention!!
Tell him, BEGONE.
What humane of cats don't shed?
ughhhhhh have u though of seeing a profesinal? no, im serious.
Go see a shrink, nutcase
Any thinking on how to cut down...
Sounds like he is awfully afraid and why would you lock him up in any room of the house?Maybe a cat is not right for you.
i have 5 yes 5 cats and they all do this, but mine adjectives talk in an american accent which is economically annoying!
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